Slow Coach Appreciator Pillows

'Come on, is there anything you can do quickly?'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

Sloth traffic jam.

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

'As an exercise I placed eleven dustbins on the pitch and made the team dribble around them...The bins won 5-0.'

A tortoise

"There's something missing on your resume'..."

"Well, what do you know, my coach remembered my birthday!"

Great coachees recognise great coaches.

"Anyone home?"

"No no no...You can kick the ball into touch, not the opposition!"

Sign outside tortoise shell: 'Out to lunch'.

"He's in lockdown."

"Mr. Green and I should be there in about 2 hours!"

"I was named Prisoner of the Year for ten years running."

Jürgen Norbert Klopp

Snail Taxi.

Tortoise: I've been fired from the Marching Band: I couldn't keep up...

"It's those creative types you ought to be checking on."

Well, you're in luck! Even though you're totally overqualified for the job, that's balanced by all the horrible things your references said about you.

I'd join you, but this dratted self-timer only waits for ten seconds!

"I shouldn't have gone to freshen up at the interval: The second act was almost over by the time I reached my seat again..."

"Easy does it, Ralph."

"Thank goodness speed bumps were finally put in. They drive like maniacs around here!"

'Sorry, I don't brake for small animals.'

'Try not to dip your shoulder and keep your head in there. Remember, all the great ones go through slumps.'

'No Rusty; not 'bark, bark'. It's; 'buerk, buerk'.'

"They look pretty angry Bob! We should consider letting them play through..."

"I'll be honest. It wasn't my first choice of career."

They put me on hold.

'You're supposed to sneeze on your own elbow.'

'Maybe they will let us play through.'

"Everything takes grandpa a little longer to do. he's analog."