Coach's Advice Lover Pillows

'Try not to dip your shoulder and keep your head in there. Remember, all the great ones go through slumps.'

What else is there to wish for?

YOLO vs YODO

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

'If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don't need advice.'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

"We can work up to antidepressants, but for now I want to start you on eating a whole jar of cocktail olives over the kitchen sink."

'Well, put a jumper on if you're cold!'

'... And as soon as it's discovered, don't play with fire!'

'I could really do with a change, couldn't you?'

Just one of the many ways self-help books can improve people's lives.

"Your aptitude is important, but more important for success is your attitude."

"I've never heard of a PE teacher giving football homework."

'As an exercise I placed eleven dustbins on the pitch and made the team dribble around them...The bins won 5-0.'

Yes, wisdom does come with age, but it's not because we've had time to Google everything.

"Don't forget to stop to take a selfie of smelling the roses and post it on social media."

'My astrologer says one thing, my guru says another, my psychiatrist says something else - I don't know who to turn to anymore.'

"Always stay rooted, or you'll turn into a tumbleweed..."

'I asked you for one good reason why I should follow your advice, not six.'

'Oh yeah! My self help group knows a lot more than your psychiatrist. First of all, there's a lot more of them.'

"No no no...You can kick the ball into touch, not the opposition!"

'I fired my motivational trainer and started listening to my mother.'

"There's something missing on your resume'..."

"It's the Ask Sadie advice hour. 'Shmernie' in Vermont, you're on. What's your problem?" "How do I know when it's time to give up? I've tried so hard to warn people about how they're getting screwed over, but they keep vot-- I mean, hanging out with the screwer-overers." "Give it up, 'Shmernie!' It's over!" "This reminds me of the time great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandmother Cohen's advice show answered a parchment from 'S

"Well, what do you know, my coach remembered my birthday!"

Great coachees recognise great coaches.

'Now this time, just for the heck of it, try releasing that sucker a little sooner,'

"I found out I'll never turn into a butterfly. I'm a moth. "

'You should have read the cookery book for teenagers. It's pretty short: 'Take the food off the package before you microwave it'.'

"I was named Prisoner of the Year for ten years running."

Spring Training

'No sweat, dad. If I'm going to live to be one hundred and six there's still plenty of time for improvement.'

Doubt makes the mountain that faith can make disappear.

"Just a word to the wise, and Gary..."

Well, you're in luck! Even though you're totally overqualified for the job, that's balanced by all the horrible things your references said about you.