Sleepy Storytellers Gifts

Husband splashing tea over newspaper.

That night, Rose found out that her husband was not only a sleepwalker, but also a sleepblogger.

Late night teddy reading

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Dog Nightmares

Shadow Puppet Bunny Threatened By Shadow Hawk

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

'She's just great with the children.'

The Poky Little Pupa.

Home Sweet Home

Pastries and Candy

'Read me the one about the ant and the obsessive-compulsive grasshopper.'

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

'Are we there yet?'

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

"And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Poppa will probably take it back to 47th Street and get something for your mother."

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

'He was a great writer'

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

Jorge Luis Borges

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"