Sleepy Storyteller Gifts

"It's too late to worry anymore tonight, I'll get up early tomorrow."

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

Ugh – Whenever I write down ideas in the middle of the night, they make absolutely no sense in the morning.

"I tried reading a book once ??" fell asleep and missed the ending."

The Bookworm

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

Tim Burton

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

Marcel Marceau's parrot

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'. . . Just thought I'd drop you a mime!'

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

Frankenstein's Ancestry

"Yes, I am interested in taking a fresh look at my holdings."

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

Cheap amusement with... THE HAPPY COUPLE!

Ghost Scare-apy Sessions

Mime father in the delivery room.

"The first rule of miming is you don't talk about miming."

Born of the Dead

'Try my health brew...1% fat, no cholesterol, high fiber and low sodium.'

"My Mom says that's what happens if you eat too much Halloween candy."

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

Monster Realtor

"Trick or treat?"

The first rule of mime club is: You Do Not Talk About Mime Club!

Quiet Quitting

Tupperware Wolf