Sleepless Supporter Gifts

'Well you said you were hot, so should I turn the fan on or not?'

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

"They say change is inevitable...thank goodness!"

'Filby, we've decided to accept your suggestion for air conditioning!'

Please Give

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

This coffee can keep you up

"Oh no, I never replied to Theresa's email! And tomorrow I must call Steve.... What does Yara think of me?"

"I've given blood about 20 times. . ."

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

"I'm so grateful to play for this fantastic club....a childhood dream come true!"

"Your 2 am is here."

"I'm going to give you something to help you sleep."

"I'm bored."

"They say yoga is good for insomnia."

Masochistic Soccer Fan

Rescuing the NHS for Christmas

Football merchandising - 1953.

"Tomorrow we go back to the hospital and replace him with a quieter model!"

"You go right on snoring, doesn’t bother me one bit. Your snores are beautiful, do you know that? I love snoring…not like some people."

'It has had phenomenal growth and, for those involved, an atmosphere crawling with excitement. Congratulations, Hawkins, for heading our Bed Bug division.'

"Damn! I STILL can't sleep!"

Alex Ferguson

STRIP *The Fan * Thinking of ditching Coventry City

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

"Sometimes, I wish we'd never invented football."

'I'd like to outlaw street mimes, too, but they have the right to remain silent.'

"I'd have been better off getting out of bed and leaving the house."

Every morning is the dawn of a new error.

'There was a petition to kick me out of the colony at night because I snore...'

'I know the club is broke, but this is going too far.'