Sleep Troubleshooter Pillows

"your wife insisted we do what we had to do to stop your snoring. And, since she really is rather scary, we were left with no other choice but to remove your face."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"I think I need an extra pillow."

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Contented man and cat sleeping

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

'I hate counting sheep. I get enough math at school.'

Do not disturb...

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

"What's with your hair?"

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

'It's not Spring yet! Go back to sleep!'

"You were snoring."

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

'It's a soothing sounds machine. Spring Rain, Summer Breeze, and Fall School Bus.'

The next step in executive efficiency - Microsoft PowerNap.

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

"We can watch anything you want, as long as I don't have to keep my eyes open."

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"