Sleep Disorder Sufferers T-Shirts

'You've got to cure my snoring, Doc! -- I'm afraid I'll lose my job with the Government!'

Areas of the Body Where Stress Can Manifest

Sleepwalker on treadmill

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"Time for bed, guys."

'It's the worst possible diagnosis a bear can receive -- sleep apnea.'

"No doctor, my husband is not sleep-walking again. He is sleep-jumping!"

Aging Sign # 23: you're dehydrated and yet up peeing all night.

The afternoons are okay, it's at night that I can't sleep.

I suppose you'd like to know why I summoned you here at 3am, minion. Not really. My studies show there's a 0.0067% uptick in coffee sales when you appear sleepier than the patrons. Come again? My theory is that's because seeing you falling asleep on your feet subconsciously makes customers feel like they need more caffeine ... From now on, you're only to sleep three non-consecutive hours per day. Very bad mazzzzz ...

'Of course I'm confused, I keep dreaming I'm an insomniac.'

"I sleep poorly anyway, so you might as well put me in high-risk investments."

"Jeff! Have you been sleepwalking again?!"

"I've heard of sleepwalking but sleep bricklaying?"

Number of times your kids will wake in the night/Amount you have to do tomorrow

"Oh, I'm really sorry to hear that you're having trouble getting out of bed in the morning; you know we do have counsellors in the building if you feel you need support with that."

"Please help me, doc! I can sleep at night!"

"This is a wonderful CV Mrs. Wilson!"

"Tom, are you cleaning in your sleep again?"

That night, Rose found out that her husband was not only a sleepwalker, but also a sleepblogger.

Think / Don't think signs.

"Why do you go to bed so late?"

'Sixty eight seconds. Pretty weak, Dad.'

"Wake up Mrs. Jones. You're sleep shopping again."

"I kept tossing and turning all winter!"

'It just turned tomorrow.'

"There's a huge crowd of people on the lawn demanding that you stop snoring!"

"Am I doing something wrong? He won't even consider hibernating."

Coffee. I'm exhausted. I started sleeping on my coin collection to keep it safe, and now I understand the saying "change is hard"!

You look terrible. I had a crazy dream then couldn't sleep. In my dream, Anderson Cooper was doing a special report on me. He described me as a materialistic jerk trying to compensate for my failures by buying stuff. See, the media does get some stuff right. Insult to insomnia.

'Sleep Disorder Research.'

"Last night I couldn't sleep! I really should stop eating coffee drinkers before I go to bed."

"Whaddya mean it's the only way you can fall asleep?!"

You know I can't sleep when you grind your teeth like that.

'Insomniacs wanted for sheep census...'