Skybound Storyteller Pillows

"… and when the captain said, 'everyone turn off their cell phones', what did you do?"

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Someone must love someone very much indeed."

"I've heard that seeing the earth from outer space can really change your perspective. I couldn't agree more."

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"And the Hungriest Black Hole there ever was ate everything in the entire universe and lived happily ever after."

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

How I met your mother

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

"'Let's try the shrink ray!' you said, 'what could possibly go wrong?', you said."

Alien characters on boy's wallpaper come to life to play with him.

An amplified harp

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

Pets in Attorney's office - 'The iguana gets everything.'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

Chicken Funeral Planning.

'They wanna know how many we seen tonight. How many you seen, Roy?' 'Well, here's quite a few tonight, Carl.'

'I've written a poem describing my feelings on discovering the body, Inspector...'

Hog Futures

Pentagon Science Contest: 'It's already an intergalactic spaceship that was sent here over a million years ago.'

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

Centaur falls in love.

'NASA is never going to believe this!'

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

"This plaque shows nine planets, but their transmissions say their system has eight."

Skywriter's Block

Robot Beggar