Skewer Seeker Gifts

'Boys of Summer on a Skewer'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

"Eat my dust!"

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

"Now that we've fallen in love, I have a confession. I'm not a giraffe—I'm fifty-eight weasels in a trenchcoat."

A Palindrome Cow.

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

Customer to skin artist: 'Can I just get a tattoo of a body piercing?'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

Man admires his Cubist Painting.

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

Junk Bonds - Back Soon - Out Chasing Yield.

Shrink

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

"Just what we've been looking for...a happy medium."

'Bitter.' 'Anything else?' 'Yea - twisted.'

Doom & Gloom

After months of writer's block, the great man's biographer finally decides how to end the book.

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

The Hollowdays.

"This place is famous for the way they serve eggs."

"Chasing Investment Yield for Fitness & Profit"

"Just even it out."

Les Bons Bourgeois - Looking in vain for the planet Leverrier

"For Trog, the discovery of the skewer far outweighed the discovery of fire... Incredible!"

'Short brown hair. Very cuddly, good in bed.'

Why Icarus Flew Too Close To The Sun

'Gone Crazy'