Singles Club Member Gifts

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"Sorry - you're just not my type...!"

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

"You'll learn a lot at our book club...like how to read between the wines."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

"Do you know what girls want?"

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

Men drinking

Snub Marine

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

'She won't even look at me. It's like I'm a banner ad.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

"Since no one showed up, I'll keep my remarks brief."

"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

'It's a deal -- I'll introduce a bill to bail out your country club, and you'll introduce a bill to bail out my country club!'

'Boy Scouts aren't ANY kind of terrorists!'

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

"I fancy tall men."

"Okay, I'm intrigued."

"hmm....I'd like to tick her box."

"He's your type--gorgeous, successful, and totally unavailable."

Peg Party.

Woman seeks male companion...

'Those girls must be in a cone of silence. I talked to them and they acted like they couldn't hear me.'

'Forget it, they're gay.'

First singles bar! 'I ain't married!'

"Well -- You're over 30 so you probably just slept on it wrong."

He sounds like a hunk, his profile says bulky and athletic

'At least I'm doing my part and getting out there!!'

'It suprises me you want your files organized.