Singing Carols Gifts

A Partridge in a Pear Tree

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

Papageno from The Magic Flute

A Fairytale Update

"I had a fear of speaking in front of people, which is why I shadow puppet and sing the lessons."

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"Michael, your father and I are worried that you're awfully young to be singing the blues."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"That is an outrageous slur."

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Girl Band, "I wish you'd tell your mum we don't need her in the group!"

Hildegard von Bingen

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

Wolf Karaoke

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Non-Denominational Carols

Mendelssohn Finds His Inspiration

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"