Silver Screen Sniffer Gifts

Double Feature: Lassie - Rin-Tin-Tin.

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

'While these products may not result in weight loss, they will result in credibility loss.'

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

"Wi-fi....Wi-fi...WI....FI!...."

"I'm just sitting here collecting vast amounts of metadata. And what are you up to?...Oh, I already know."

"We're trying to give geriatrics a sexier image..."

You're certain you've had plenty of experience serving in a fine dining restaurant?

"Boy, the Reverend sure has your number."

"He had an uncanny ability to pick up the scent of opportunity."

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

Canadian wildfires

"If I've got no messages how do I know I even EXIST!"

The TV asks a man on a computer: 'Don't you love ME anymore?'

"You'd have thought they'd have all slept with each other by now."

"Great neighborhood. You're only minutes away from a yoga studio."

Trust the critics. They know best what makes a good movie.

"I like having a laptop with a big screen, but my back doesn't."

Another dramatic moment ruined by seasonal allergies.

"Coffee?! I thought we were just meeting to stare at our phones!"

"Digital skid row"

'I hate it when the pollen count's high!'

"Have you ever thought about getting an e-reader?"

'Arrest that man, officer. His clothes simply reek of cigarette smoke.'

'Since I'm not old enough to smoke, I thought I'd stand here and inhale. I read that the effects of slash burns are as harmful as cigarettes.'

Social Media Distancing

Hadley K., All-Day Sucker.

'I think I know how the robbers got in. Someone forgot to lock the doggy door.'