Silver Citizen Thinkers Gifts

'It's called SOCIAL security, but I don't have an extra dime to go anywhere or do anything.'

"I came here to get in shape, young man! What does me picking up your bar bill have to do with it?"

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

"I may be an aged whiskey, but inside I still feel like a fresh ear of corn!"

American Venn diagram

Whitehall: Gave honest impartial advice

International Monetary Conference in Paris- Silver Currency an Unsound Footing

Pensioners run riot on mobility scooters.

'Remember your blood pressure, dear!...the Dr, warned about anything that would anger you, like this divided congress and their inability to compromise on things beneficial to the nation.'

'Listen Mabel, you are 70, I am 75 and we have known each other since junior school. It's pure wishful thinking on your part if you claim I am 'grooming' you...'

'We'd like to have a look at the decimation of public services in the area.'

"60 Fortune 500 companies paid no federal taxes last year. . . meanwhile, thanks to a lack of funding, I no longer get dessert in my meals on wheels."

Gerontologist on the phone - 'Oh, you know ... same old, same old ... and how are things with you?'

'He joined the party in support of the police cuts.'

Caution: Institutional Guardrails Not Nearly as Strong as We All Thought...

'I'm feeling down, too - Why don't we pass some feel-good legislation?'

I can be upgraded, can you?

People want as much government as they deserve.

"Those are the basic necessities of life? Aren't you forgetting something?"

"I increase my small pension by working as an expert on selling anti-incontinence products!"

'I'll teach that social security computer a few things!'

'For a moment, I thought I heard the candidates back on the issues.'

'I'd do the 'common good' more often if there were big lobbyist bucks in it for me.'

'Its a shame that the taxpayers and voters are the same person.'

Electoral College

"You know you're getting old when you can find your way around all the local hospitals blindfolded."

Street vendor selling 'Hot Buttons' for the presidential primaries.

'The anger management class ruined our budget when they ordered love seats.'

'We didn't mean to place an order online. We're just trying to figure out how to turn it on.'

Mobility Park.

'You can't say that all your campaign promises were slips of the tongue!'