Siblings Who Are Pet Owners Pillows

"Yep, that's water retention."

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

A large leaf falling on a dog

Skeleton playing fetch.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"This never happened."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."

Pet Entertainers

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

State of the Art Dog.

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

When Dogs Appear To Be Thinking.

Jumping Dogs

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

Man wearing a dog cone

People with pet dogs in a dog park with workout equipment for dogs.

'I've finally learned to delegate.'

If dogs were psychiatrists.

I can't afford to pay for Fluffy's spay...

"He's obedient as long as my requests align with his internal moral imperatives."

'Peel, Spot! Peel!'

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

Dog to dog: 'I hate the way pointers are always blaming somebody else.'

'This refrigerator isn't big enough for the both of us.'

"We keep revisiting this leash thing... Why is it so difficult for him?"