Show Business Dreamer T-Shirts

'The casting director said I shouldn't ring them, they would ring me, but that was 10 years ago!'

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'You're close, Spencer, but usually a business plan is a little more involved!'

'Ideas.com' desk with a 'come' tray and a 'gone' tray.

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

Computer Hitching a Ride to Silicon Valley

Lemonade Stand With Free Wi-Fi

Money Plant.

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

"I just need help getting started. A little seed money."

S.S.dot.com

"We'll analyze the only thing left to analyze: what people throw away."

'I'm a star!'

'Man it's a tough crowd tonight!'

"Take my advice; speak softly but carry a big shtick."

Toenail clipping missile.

Hollywood producer.

"You're just gaming down there? Shouldn't you be issuing your first IPO for some billion dollar internet enterprise you've created?"

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

'I begin to question whether this startup ever had venture capital.'

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"Fashion Week"

"Let's all sing our theme song: 'I Love Venture Capital'."

"Er. . . anything else?"

TV stage door

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."