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Tall tales, short stories

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Edgar Allen Poe

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

The First Sentence Fragment: 'Hey, don't -'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

Script/Director/Producer/Decency Panel.

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

Hitchcock's The Birds

'This history paper is about an event that happened a long time ago, but in the great scheme of things isn't all that important, making this report very short. The end.'

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."

Waiting Room For Godot.

Will Self deprecation

"Madame, you're the most beautiful lady in the whole country and as sweet as apple pie!"

"Tests! That's one thing I don't like about the end of school. I can't believe it! You're not finished studying, either?"

Clarence always halved lots of cargo.

'It's the new directive from Brussels. We're to steal from everybody and give directly to the banks.'

Poking gentle fun at the company in the blog wasn't meant to include saying that the chief exec had a face like a baboons bottom.

'We have the ideas for product placement and now all we need is the script.'

Anton Chekhov

"But you got some good reviews too, yeah?"

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

'Sorry, your resume isn't funny enough.'

Woman and books.

"I'm writing a novel, but it's hard to find alone time."

"Johnson's our head of forecasting, he alos works part-time as a successful science fiction writer."

"Yep, that's it - seven pages, I only write what I know."

Machado de Assis

What the Person Sitting Next to You at Starbucks is 'Working On'

Having finished writing his latest 400-page novel, Anton Chekhov divides it into 32 short stories,