Shopping King/queen Gifts

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Killer Executive Suits.

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

Any time is cake o'clock

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

Handbag store - "Perfect."

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Cut Price

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Other girl's luxuries are my necessities.

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

Toadstools

Bad for you but to die for

'She's so put together!'