Shopping King/queen Gifts

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Killer Executive Suits.

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Any time is cake o'clock

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Cat woman shopping for cats.

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

Handbag store - "Perfect."

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Toadstools

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

Cut Price

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Other girl's luxuries are my necessities.

Bad for you but to die for