Shopping Humorous T-Shirts

'This is the only way I can get him to come shopping with me...'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Pirates at the mall.

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

"Once you break through the plastic clamshell and blister packs, there won't be any packaging left!"

"How much is the sign?"

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

'SALE! One Million Dollars Per Bike!!' by saying, 'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Pirate trying on parrots.

Great moments in shopping

If you don't see what you want, buy something you don't want!

"Let's see now; rat's gizzard, bats wings, eye of newt....oh, yes. And cornflakes!"

Self Checkout

"I'm not sure. Maybe it's my wife's butt size I'm thinking of!"

"Footwear's upstairs, Sir"

"So if I'm to understand you correctly, this 'engineered athletic footwear' with its 'extended torsion system' is also a sneaker?"

Fresh milk - Self service

Snowman tries on carrot noses.

"Unexpected Spanish Inquisition in bagging area ..."

Crap Nav

'He's been visiting IKEA with someone else.'

Toothpaste mental shutdown.

Woman walking past Five Guys.

'Well, it all tastes like the same old crap to me,'

"Will this be cash or consumer debt?"

Market items.

Gross pig size!

no nonsense or ridiculous pantyhose.

'Some achieve fame. I've achieved a stack of catalogs full of sticky notes.'

"Thank you Madam. That will be £5000 plus 5p for the bag, of course..."

I shopped in the Garden of Eden.

'The store was out of light bulbs, so I got lite beer instead.'

Snacks, Condiments, Necessary Evils.