Shopper Savants T-Shirts

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

Cut Price

A women in a shoeshop.

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"I shop, therefore I am."

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"Where can I find the lefts?"

A young couple selects items from a shop.

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

"'IF modom decides to change it' - don't you mean WHEN??"

Customer Convention

'Let's go and make some unfunded spending committments.'

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"If at first you don't succeed, buy, buy again."

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

It was a good chance to get together and talk shop.

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

'Do you have this in a smaller size?'

Self-Checkout.

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

"I'll try them on at home. You can just return what doesn't fit."

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Irregulars

'But I think shopping three times a week is more than enough exercise!'

'In the war against full price, we are winning...'

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

"Come back to bed. You know sleep deprivation lowers your sales resistance."