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Instacart Substitutions

The Age of Reptiles. . .

He looks so natural lying there...

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

I love Museum Shops

"Play 'Misty' for me."

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

I always forget - Are we supposed to tip?

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

Never give a cow a giant straw.

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

Dog detectives

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

Millionaire trapped in the body of a bum. Please help correct the situation. ?

He only had enough money for one, and for the life of him he couldn't remember the difference,

"Sure. I know of a haystack on the edge of town where you'll be safe until the heat dies down."

"Another clear case of COVID19."

'He's been shot!'

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Toast kidnapper.

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

101 uses of a dead cat: toilet brush

'I stopped you so I could find out where you got that great outfit.'

House for Sale.

'The paintings are neolithic, I suspect the Mustaches wee added by a later people.'

Police are searching for a male between 16 and 25 years, with a silky sheer taupe complexion and a run over his left eye.

'Mr. Pennrose isn't so bad...when he gives someone a pink slip, he always draws a smiley face on it.'