Shopper's Sense Of Humor Pillows

'I'd better get two, in case they aren't very absorbent.'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

'How much would you take off for cash?'

"Sorry, Martin, but because you're the weakest link in our food chain here, you're fired."

"How much is the sign?"

'SALE! One Million Dollars Per Bike!!' by saying, 'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Man stands in front of rows of kangaroos next to a sign that reads "Final Clearance - Entire stock of kanagroos".

Santa checking out sleigh beds.

Pirate trying on parrots.

Low income vampires.

We Offer Fast, Friendly Or Quality Service! "So, which one do you want?"

"Let's see now; rat's gizzard, bats wings, eye of newt....oh, yes. And cornflakes!"

Great moments in shopping

I'm sorry sir, store rules. No 'Stairway to Heaven'.

Self Checkout

"I'm not sure. Maybe it's my wife's butt size I'm thinking of!"

Fresh milk - Self service

Snowman tries on carrot noses.

"Unexpected Spanish Inquisition in bagging area ..."

The customer is always right, but that fact has no standing in law.

'Well, it all tastes like the same old crap to me,'

Kevin's concerns over horsemeat in the beefburgers evaporated when he passed the frozen fish cabinet.

"Will this be cash or consumer debt?"

Breakages must be paid for

Bed, Bath & Younder

no nonsense or ridiculous pantyhose.

I shopped in the Garden of Eden.

"It's all business-to-business. We need some retail outlets."

Market items.

'Oh no, we forgot to lock the safe!' 'What's the problem, we're both here aren't we?'

'The store was out of light bulbs, so I got lite beer instead.'

"You can't find the menswear department? Oh, I'm sorry, Sir- I was standing in front of it."

Complaints and Excuses.