Shock Survivor Gifts

Tiptoeing around voltometers.

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

Piano and Pianist with broken legs.

Gary turns 40.

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

'Honey, did you bring the anti-nausea pills?'

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

"Great God Almighty! Somebody please wake me up and tell me I'm only dreaming that the chicken marsala costs a whopping twenty-eight ninety-five!"

"I see you do all your own stunts."

Sporting maladies.

'And you say your face after you looked at the bill I sent you for your last visit.'

In case of stock market crash break glass.

'I've battened down the TV to protect us from weather reports.'

"Well, dear, you can quit worrying about our roof!"

Warning: Cathartic manifestations of childhood trauma next 5 miles

'You've got a broken finger.'

'Bloody plaster of Paris.'

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

Gymnast tangled up.

"And now Survivor Six...walking through your kid's room barefoot in the dark..."

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

'I'll soon have you in stitches but it's no laughing matter.'

'It's an old baseball injury.'

'He saved his dog before he saved me during the hurricane!'

"You owe your life to that dog. He pulled you to safety. Unfortunately, there's still no sign of the dog ??" or your arm."

"You been here long?"

Trees and hurricanes

Green Shoots

'I'll be able to play the piano in 2 days? Well I couldn't before the accident!'

"Well guys,how was the hockey game?"

"What makes you think you have cabin fever?"

"I'm getting a slight draught through the double glazing, you fitted for me."