Ship Surgeon Gifts

On board the MS Hepatology

Someone who knows apostrophes

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

Toy Boats And A Toy Ocean Liner

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

What if Pirates Were Born With Their Wooden Leg?

Body Building

'Oh for heaven's sake, Jim... all he wants to do is perform a vasectomy on you.'

Surgeon to other: 'First organ transplant?'

"First of all, where and what is a prostrate?"

'Remember the NHS ethos; if it ain't broke, break it. Then make sure it can't be mended.'

Joint Replacement Specialist has 3 boxes on desk: "Hip", "Hip", "Hooray."

"There was a system failure that caused a brief crash, but fortunately I was able to reboot."

"These aren't barnacles. Someone stuck their gum down here."

The shakedown escalates.

"Sigh! No boating today." "For? Damn!" "Okay, prep her. Oh, and cancel my tee time." "How elective surgery really works."

"Don't worry about a thing, I learned to do this in prison."

"I just ate my organ donor card."

'We've got a cloudburst here...it's raining stats and logs!'

"Nurse, could you please click Ok?"

'O.K. people, it's time to test our work...'

"We lose a little dexterity, but we gain a lot of confidence."

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

"Nothing beats the thrill of operating beyond one's competence."

"Well... the good news is we've dealt with your ingrowing toenail..!"

"Well, at least his heart's in the right place."

"O.K.—I've got the tongue."

A Chef Never Rests

"I suppose you're the brains behind the operation"

'He's the ship's plumber, Captain.'

"I sympathize. It's weird for me too."

When Surgeons Work At Home