Shenanigans Specialist Pillows

"Tonight's top stories—chaos, pandemonium, mayhem, and the latest shenanigans of ____."

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

'She'll never look for me here.'

"Mum, I got the job!"

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Ready...."

'I was on my way to school, and some drug-crazed hippies took my homework.'

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

Fisherman catches swimmer.

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

'It's crazy what a peep will eat.'

Two Wise Men & One Wise Guy

'My brother ate my homework.'

'Grab the wand! Grab the wand!'

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

"Hey, will you kids stop trying to stick fridge magnets on your Aunt Marge!"

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

"I never noticed how much you guys look alike! Que chulos!"

'This should really freak out the bird watchers.'

'Oh, heavens no. I was merely speaking figuratively when I said that I wanted to break every bone in his body.'

'I couldn't help notice, Miss, we seem to be going to the same place.'

Man riding a fish

'Isn't it amazing how we can fall asleep standing?'

'Hot! Hot!'

"Is there anything I can do for extra credit, like give you money?"

'No Billy! I am not ready to see you yet!'

'I sent Higgins on a wild goose chase so we could get some work done.'

Boy shouting at and frightening an old lady

"For some reason, people drink a lot less since I brought my twin brother into the business."

"Stealing office supplies, eh? I'm in for murder one!"

"Every time I got frustrated with my computer, I would slam on the keyboard. This time the keyboard fought back."