Shark Week Fans Gifts

"It's slow everywhere right now. For crying out loud, Boris, it's shark week."

'Do you prefer white or dark meat?'

"We've got a problem."

Horror movies

Beach con-man.

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Bite out of fishing pier.

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

The Food Chain

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

Leak in the fish tank.

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

"Heads or tails?"

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

Whale Shark Thoughts...

Sand danger

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

'They're showing 'Jaws' on TV tonight: The beaches should be quiet for a few days after that!'

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

Ice Fishing

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

Shark food pyramid.

"I'll have a man overboard!"

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'