Shark Week Fan Gifts

Shark swimming in a bathtub surrounded by blood.

"This party sucks! I thought there were going to be swimmers!"

Shark in the swimming pool.

I told you not to eat that Blowfish.

A shark enjoying his newspaper in front of his trophies of swimmer's arms and legs.

"It's not that I'm not grateful... But I do wish you could have saved me from the shark a little sooner."

Beach con-man.

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Bite out of fishing pier.

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

Horror movies

The Food Chain

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

Shark infested custard!

"Heads or tails?"

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

Ice Fishing

'Dude, someone put a sign on your front.'

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

Sand danger

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

'I hate evolution!'

Shark food pyramid.

"The end of 'Shark Week' is near!"

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'