Shaker Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Shakers don't like subways'

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

"When I kiss you the earth moves. Or was that just an aftershock?"

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

Fracking Zone - Be prepared for anything.

"In this company, Simmons, we hold our hands steady in the middle and shake our bodies."

"They're the closest I've come to owning a car!"

Mrs. Richter's Scale.

'Trainers for actually playing sport in.'

"I decided to go on land after I got the sneaker deal."

I don't know how many times I've told Mahovlich - he's the speaker, not the goalie!

'It must be love if your sneakers melted!'

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

"Of course, ladies and gentlemen, the optimum endorsement would be from the Crips and the Bloods."

Dept. of Seismology. The foundation is fully funding my San Andreas research! They're generous to a fault!

"Here it is - 'Surviving an Earthquake'..."

'Something comfortable and yet… unexpected. I like to run amok.'

Monk Synth Bell Ringers

'Would our taxes be any cheaper if we lived in a sketcher?'

"I want you to decrease your salt intake and increase your pepper intake."

Shaker Timeouts

Shuffle Shame

Snail Shoes

Burgers Fries Shakes. Order Here. I think my college degree must be worth a lot --- It's hardly been used at all!

'You'll have to come up with something new...Nobody notices you anymore.'

'Pretend you don't notice San Andreas.'

'It must be love if your sneakers melted!'

"Very good! Let's try it again. . . this time a little more assertively!"

Earthquake Research Society. The meeting's over already? Yep --- it was called to order at 8:00 and adjourned at 8:02 by a motion from the floor.

How bad can the economy be with this many styles of sneaker socks?

"Something comfortable with good arch support and a cushioned heel. He wants to run away from home."

Tear Along this Line.