Shaker Aficionado Gifts

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

"We'd like to do a song that will barely penetrate your consciousness as you continue to enjoy those faddish cigars and single-malt scotches."

"From downtown...the shark scores!"

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'

"I'll have a man overboard!"

'I think he wants you to play ball!'

'And get this: just when I thought the worst was over, the media blasts me for 'opportunistic, predatory business tactics!' Boy, did THAT sting!'

"Little Jamie would like you both to know that he's now into sharks."

"In this company, Simmons, we hold our hands steady in the middle and shake our bodies."

"Scotch and water, *hic* scotch and water..."

"They're the closest I've come to owning a car!"

"So I said 'Hey, not everybody likes jokes about shark-fin soup.' And? Oh, he apologized right away. Good! That was super-insensitive. No kidding! That's exactly what I said before I ate him."

'Water is a valuable good and we should use it sparingly. That's why I'd like my Scotch straight.'

'Trainers for actually playing sport in.'

'According to the breathalyser, you're 50,000 glasses of sherry over the legal limit.'

"I decided to go on land after I got the sneaker deal."

Divers attache BITE ME sign to companion's oxygen tanks.

"So many acquisitions lately ... should we be worried?"

'I teach history specializing in swashbuckling.'

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

"Of course, ladies and gentlemen, the optimum endorsement would be from the Crips and the Bloods."

'Man eater?! No way, it was just a nibble!'

'It must be love if your sneakers melted!'

'Would our taxes be any cheaper if we lived in a sketcher?'

'Something comfortable and yet… unexpected. I like to run amok.'

Shark Surfing the Waves.

"... And that one I tickled to death."

'Shark fin's soup madam.'

"What's the problem? Never seen a shark's tooth earing before?"

Shaker Timeouts