Sex Positivity Gifts

"...good night lube, good night lair, good night noises everywhere."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

"Privates Beach"

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

Critisize your weight.

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

Lots of personal improvement classes are going on down there. The white blood cells are teaching a self-defense class. The neuron is instructing others about improving communication skills. And a proton and cornea cell have teamed up to teach a class on staying focused and positive! Is the helium atom participating in any of this? No, he thinks he's above it all!

A woman is as young as she feels like admitting to.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'I tried being pessimistic. I was terrible at it.'

Breast Height Chart

'I gotta lose some weight.'

Congratulations on the new you!

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'I've moved from being cautiously optimistic to being optimistically cautious.'

"That's a big fat lie!"

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

'I'm feeling so good, I'm worried I may catch some uplift anxiety.'

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Well, she certainly is one of our more positive employees!

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

Aging Problems

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."