Service Dog Enthusiast Pillows

"Typical. They're happy to benefit from our service but just try and come in as a customer."

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Here's something extra to cover his lousy tip. Blame his fifth grade math teacher."

'The customer is always right...'

'How did you train him so well?'

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

'Nothing on the sign says I have to have a person with me.'

"Your confirmation number is 7913842461. To hear this information again press 1."

'Hi, my name's Mandy and I'll be your culturally inappropriate annoyance this evening.'

An Emotional Support Pet's Support Pet's Support Pet.

'I apologize for repeatedly asking if everything is okay, but displaying customer concern is part of our mission statement.'

So...who is your provider ?

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

"How is it you can commit to world class service but not to me?"

"Thanks for waiting."

'It's a service animal.'

"He's not my dog, he's my partner."

Blind man's guide dog is looking at art in an art gallery.

"Hang on hon. A table with a more expensive tab needs me."

Boy cleaning servant's shoes

A cat leading a dog leading a man

"I'm a highly skilled service companion specifically trained to help people with disabilities such as visual impairment, PTSD and other disorders."

Blind woman, blind dog, seeing eye cat.

'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'

'I could sue you for being species-ist.'

Coffee shop request for tea in china cup.

Guide dogs assist people glued to their phones

'I never get tipped!'

Maid.

"What abouts...the ones who are allergic to all these service animals?"

Cut out and keep your own Butler.

'I appreciate your enthusiasm in serving me but I never tip more than 15 percent.'

"We're out of tuna fish, but the kid in table six said you can have a bite of his tuna sandwich."

"Yes, he is a bit slow, but he's really careful and I've been assured that I'll have him for a long time."