Serious Life Hack Explorer Gifts

ZBIGNIEW BREZINSKI'S TIPS FOR TEENS

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

Weird things I do because of the internet

"Did you get my tweet?"

'Fetching newspapers is over. Now I aggregate blogs for him.'

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

"Being with you is just getting too surreal for me, Larry."

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

"Mi chiamano Mimi, il perche non so. Sola, mi fo il pranzo da me stessa."

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

'Life if so much simpler since we called Family Ref.'

"Now give me something intimate to say."

"...as the devices were nestled on their chargers with care,..."

'Am I on your good Facebook friend list, or on your bad Facebook friend list?'

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

Spring branding on the Hashtag Ranch.

"I just feel like we're not connecting."

Danger Quicksand

Sorry, I don't play footsie on the first date. Neither do I. I guess that leaves rats.

'Good evening sir.Just wondering if you'd like to sample Night-Mart's new range of A-positive.'

Gigolo Diary

People crossing the street while texting use white canes.

"I love talking to you about my problems. We should do a podcast."

Secrets of Adulthood.

'Oversensitive Car Alarm'

This wasn't quite the fairytale ending Colin had anticipated.

Finally, I found a good use for that leak.

Archeology 101.

'Please tell me there's more to this than this.'

"Boys meet the girls. Girls meet the boys. . ."

'Are you having a mid-life crisis?', 'Let's hope so.'

"We can't go on meeting like this, I'm practically broke."