Sensible Sipper Pillows

'Pub drinking games with bottled water may be sensible, but they're bloody boring.'

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"You had me at alternative milk."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

Anton's Bar and Grill

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

A very fine vintage

Velvety. And so was the wine.

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

'It's not worth worrying about. There's nothing you can do about it. No two quarks in a small region can occupy the same quantum-mechanical state.'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

Can I get you another coffee?

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

The youth shows responsibility!

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

"Are you looking for 'drinks and nibbles' beer, 'I don't really drink beer' beer, or good old fashioned 'gidday mate' beer?"

'Too acidic? On the contrary, I find it well balanced.'

New for Fall

Gin-etic Engineering

Walking here to the tavern allows me to decrease my carbon footprint and increase my bourbon footprint.