Senior Pickup Master Pillows

"You have a beautiful smile. It would look great in a glass of water next to my bed."

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

'Would you like to dance?' Woman has 'No' written on her t-shirt. Guy has 'Why not?'.

"They're especially bold at this time of year."

"Why do you wear green lipstick?"

'Any chance of a bit of....er...Blue on Blue?'

"It's 'Modern Music Night' tonight. Will you be joining the others in the mosh pit?"

"So, back to my place?"

Steve needed to work on his approach.

Snake charmer tries sleazy pick-up on snake at a bar.

All-aluminum-body pickup truck with optional door handles.

"Polar? Or simply slow to warm."

"Remember, son. Everything happens for a reason. Or because someone messed up real bad."

"Believe it or not, but we're Batman and Robin off duty!"

'Hiya, spaceman.'

Last night in a bar I said to a woman, "I can't get no satisfaction." I figure if it worked for Mick Jagger, it might work for me. Did it get you any satisfaction? It got me a lecture on grammar.

'Lose the shell. We're skins.'

Do you come here often? May I buy you a brief?

"Nice shirt. Is it made of boyfriend material?"

"How's my drinking?" bumper sticker

'I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.'

"I may not be Mr. Right, but I know Mr. Right, and maybe if you sleep with me it will make him jealous."

'She didn't say she'd go out with me, but she left the door open for further negotiations.'

So, your place...or my mother's?

Old Farts Keep Right.

'You haven't asked me out in weeks. Would I like to go out to a movie? No thanks I'm busy!'

"Had a pickup truck but kept a cat. Rejection, right?"

'So now I've got a dollar burning a hole in my pocket...'

'Sorry. Pickup lines don't work on me.'

'Hi, didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?'

"I'll take this book. A buddy recommended it to me. . . no idea why. Holy crap! You're one helluva hot chick!!"

Parking Lot Dare

Hi, I'm Lars Fusco, and I've got a bottle of wine back at my house that has your name on it. What makes you think my name is "Thunderbird"?

"These aren't 'etchings,' Romeo, they're lithographs."

Another Failed Geek Pickup Line