Senior Martial Artist T-Shirts

'Instead of a black belt, some of our older students, like Mr. Mertz here, prefer the black suspenders.'

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

Overjumpers

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Hi-yah!"

"Ninja bread men"

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Women's Martial Arts Center

"Full disclosure—I really need this hug."

'Remember me?'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Mod Kwan Doh

Old Karate Master

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Somebody keeps snapping all the stud boards in half. Anybody know anything about this?'

A martial arts student saws a block of wood in half

A street fight.

Sudok Fu: Sign up for class today!

Mitch Lee, kung-fondue master.

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

"What did I tell you about practicing on the cat?"

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

'Your Thai-chi-chicken Sir.'

Cluck Norris in...LAYED in ACTION!

'Elroy had an unfortunate knack for picking fights with the wrong people'

"And what if the assailant comes at you from inside your own head."