Senior Living Expert T-Shirts

'I had a larger sample for you but I had trouble getting the lid back on. . .'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

Stairlift around cliff face.

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

"My novel is about a romance between an octogenarian and a septuagenarian, but I can't remember which is which."

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

The Oaks: Breakfast And Back To Bed.

New Hampshire Minute

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

'Okay, we grew old together - Now what?'

"You want the truth? I can't remember the truth!"

"I look forward to growing dead with you."

'It's a pretty lame disappearing act Darling: I think we'd better hire a real Magician for Timmy's birthday party...'

"Things moving too fast. We need to get back to our roots. And grubs."

Amongst the rush.

Organic farm

My husband is a world expert, but unfortunately it's only on maganese bronze.

"Yes sir, I'm late. But I thought we were supposed to stop and smell the roses..."

"Would you care for a slice of lemon dribble cake Mr Dobbs?"

"Apart from fifty foot away, where do you see yourself, say in the next three months?"

'Oh no! We forgot to unstrap granny before we left!'

'So June, do you think we should get a stairlift or just move to a bungalow...because, let's face it, we're getting on and here will come a point...when you won't be able to carry me up the stairs anymore.'

'Life is too long not to worry.'

Back Down

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

"His hip isn't getting any better. I really should have him put to sleep."