Self-righteous Surfer Pillows

"Hmm... I wonder what I can find to trigger my self-righteous indignation today..?"

Surfing koala.

'I can't stand his 'holier than thou' attitude.'

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

Capitalism.

'You beached again, didn't you?'

Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'

Gracebook.

The End of the Internet

101 uses of a dead cat: surf board.

It's a mobile, wireless internet device

'We don't know HOW to surf - Can't you part the sea or something?'

Finally. A home exercise system that really is a clothes rack!

Portaloo Tidal Wave.

'I hate rainy days!'

"Oh, I don't eat turkey. One of my spiritual advisers is a turkey."

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

Looking For Love.

"Dude, are you taking selfies?"

'I suppose you think you're funny?'

"I suppose a lot of people do their worshipping online these days."

'Does 'Amen' mean 'Send'?'

'I'm going to give you a prescription for your walking pneumonia...Take one pill every three miles.'

Internet Access@expensive.phone.bill.co.uk

'Click on the icon.'

Pete Carroll

'He googles you. That's how God knows everything about you.'

Surfing the Brown Water.

Surf's up!

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu.

'I said no more surfer snacks before the feeding frenzy!'

'I still have a soft spot for my ex- like quicksand!'

'You didn't EITHER just friend the Pope!'

"Wow! That's incredible! I mean...how did you know I used to be a white guy?"

Fruitcake