Self-representation Enthusiast Pillows

"I'm supposed to warn you of the perils of being your own attorney...but I can't do it with a straight face."

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

Justice 4 Ron

What every man thinks to himself when he puts on a pink shirt.

"I have a personal blog, therefore I am!"

"Goodnight, Dan, you handsome devil!"

The Girl With The Draggin' tattoo: 'Hot...Cold.'

'I gave up hope of receiving a Genius Grant years ago. Now I'm basically shooting for the less impressive Mediocrity Grant.'

"Sorry, I don't have an opinion - just in case I get vilified on social media. . ."

'I wouldn't advise you to write your autobiography. It would be a very dull read.'

'The baby took some cellphone pictures of you napping!'

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

'What's the difference between solitude and loneliness, doctor?'

'I'd trust you anywhere - I think!'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

'Someone stole my identity, didn't like it and sent it back.'

"Oh come now, Mr And Mrs narcissus, Have you two been fighting again?"

"If I'm coming across as shallow, uncaring and egocentric, talk to my image manager."

Seminar: Find Someone Cool to Imitate.

'If only I could accept that I can't accept being someone who finds it hard to accept acceptance from those who accept me for the person that I can't accept I really am.'

"I do feel like my old self, but I want to feel like my young self!"

"Maybe I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill. I do that a lot."

Caterpillar Paranoia

'Have you considered drawing other people?'

'I never forget a face.'

100% Bombast-Filled Parka

“You must be this self aware and emotionally secure to go on this ride”