Self-perception Explorer Gifts

'I'm a good ape, but I've never really been a great ape.'

'You lie!'

"Hi gordeous!"

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

A woman is as young as she feels like admitting to.

Man to date about many self-portraits on his wall: 'Self-realization is where I'm headed.'

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Every time I explore the corners of my mind, I have the urge to dust."

For $10 I'll show you how you're ugly.

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

"Adolescencia"

What brings you to therapy, Rudy? Dr. Noodle. I've been feeling like my whole life is on pause. And I can't find the remote to unpause it. Meanwhile, everyone else's stories are proceeding apace. They're all into the second act already. They've all had plot twists, and hero's journeys, and epic love scenes, and thrilling reversals of fortune ... Meanwhile, I'm still paused on the opening credits because no remote. Why don't you get up off the couch and unpause it manually? You can do that?

The company lawyer's self-image vs the boss's self-image.

Psychology Clinic. Most potent example of solipsism I've ever seen --- he follows himself on Twitter.

"Look, I still fit into the fitted sheet I wore when we met."

It all began with free-range chicken. Then it was organic vegetables. Next the farmers decided they should all take a year off to go find themselves.

'Does my bum look big in this?'

'I just feel so used all the time.'

"It doesn't matter if anyone believes in you. . . what's important is that you believe in yourself!"

"Nobody wants to steal my identity."

"My self esteem is low ... how come I never got hacked?"

"I feel like I'm moving from my quiet desperation phase into something a bit more colorful."

"It's not the timing of our relationship that's wrong. It's the lighting."

After a lifetime of searching, Leonard finds himself.

"Papi! Papi! I figured it out! I know exactly what I'm gonna be when I grow up!"

Well there's something you don't see every day...

"So tell me - what makes you think you're a 'monster'?"

"Therapy is wonderful. Finally to have someone who pays attention to my self esteem issues."

"Well, Mr. Trouble, it's likely your low self esteem is linked to your given name."

Psychiatry. Why go on a voyage of self-discovery when I can just Google myself?