Self-improvement Seeker Gifts

'And if you ever did catch your tail, are you sure it would make you happy?'

A medal podium with places for first, second and third is contrasted with a spot at the bar for fourth place.

'If you ain't broke, I'll fix it.'

New Year's Resolutions: 1. Be more decisive. 2. Ummmm...

'My strength lies in my ability to deny my weaknesses.'

'Having done the mentoring skills questionnaire I think I need a mentor to mentor me in improving my mentoring.'

'My fortune says 'You will be successful in getting students to control their behavior, if you first control your own behavior.'

Personality Test - No Result

Won't admit he has a problem. Won't even admit he's the patient.

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'Have you considered getting a life-coach?'

Learning Curve

Seminar: Find Someone Cool to Imitate.

'Doc I just don't believe in myself anymore.'

Resolutions.

'I'm really serious about keeping my New Year's resolutions. In the past, my resolutions were always in one year and out the other.'

"I just know if I could only lose a few pounds, everything in my life would fall into place!"

"Someone is always better."

'I need help in being able to ask for help.' - 'Okay, you need help.'

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"Everything I eat goes straight to my ass."

'Running away from your problems does not count as exercise.'

A person thinking happy thoughts that insulate him from the gloom around him

"Why me?"

"Try not to make the world any worse."

'You've got to stop living in the past.'

'You can change your spots, but you must really want to change.'

'Is there a machine that's not in front of mirrors? I know what I look like...that's why I am here.'

Getting in shape (or not)

"It's no disgrace - somebody has to be plain vanilla."

'Lies! Nothing but lies!'

'I was once a caterpillar like you, then I started to listen to personal improvement tapes and viola, look at me now!'

Pianist Envy.

Discomfort zone.

Emotional Baggage Claim Area