Self-image Skeptics T-Shirts

"That's a big fat lie!"

"Nice haircut."

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

"What does she have that I don't?"

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'The baby took some cellphone pictures of you napping!'

"If I'm coming across as shallow, uncaring and egocentric, talk to my image manager."

TV-Mirror.

Seminar: Find Someone Cool to Imitate.

A man imagines he looks like a farmer on a tractor on a ride-on mower and

'Seth, please bring me a copy of every search engine article that mentions my name in a favorable light. I need an ego boost.'

'I've got a question. If your answer is 'Yes', I'll hate you. If your answer is 'No', I'll hate you, too. The question is, do you think I need a new dress because I'm looking fat in this one?'

"Stock photo, right?"

"Yes, but why did they use a picture that makes me look fat?!"

'Do you have anywhere where they'd think I was good looking.'

'Casper just lost twenty seven and a half pounds, but his head is just as fat as ever.'

Cartoon Panel Discussion

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

'Some boys think I'm pretty. Some think I'm ugly. What do you think?'

"-But APART from 38" 22" 36" what else do you want to be, Cynthia?"

'Admit it, Henry, you only love me for my hair.'

"Don't think you can just come in here and self-describe."

Virtual reality mirror.

'I'd like to buy a frame that adds youth to a portrait.'

'I'll take THIS mirror.'

'He wants to look slightly mysterious and menacing.'

'I'm just sayin', with this cute little face and my big fluffy tail, I never really thought of myself as vermin!'

'No, I don't like them, their shirts make me look fat.'

"Does this dress make my ass stick out?"

"I'm trying to find that perfect piece of art that will make me think I know something about art."

"Ed was at that awkward in between stage of letting his hair grow out." "C'mon. C'mon. C'mon..."