Self-esteem Champions Gifts

I'm the gorilla's nuts... I'm the dog's bo****ks... He's never been good at hiding his light under a bushel.

Power is not a four-letter word

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

'I haven't been able to come to grips with it. My hands are too small.'

"Well, I'm sad for Gloria...she's gonna be bummed out when I'm twice as successful as she is."

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

PROBLEM AREAS

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

Emoticon Encouragement Therapy

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

Always remember...you're the best you in the world.

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

Don't Take No For an Answer

Girl's weight issues.

"At first I thought I'd hate it, but now I have to have it."

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

"My fuse about my height is about as short as I am."

'It's Always 'Good Dog'—Never 'Great Dog.'

"Dear, it's a well known fact that women's clothes shrink in the closet during winter!"

'Great white shark! Where do they get that 'great' stuff? Know how hard that is to live up to?'

'Fortunately, I'm not driven by a deep need for validation.'

'I'm trying to work on Mr. Findlay's self-esteem, Miss Oglethorpe — stop giggling in there!'

"Well. It DOES make you look thinner."

Latest support group: British actors who couldn't get a part in the Harry Potter films.

'I'm afraid my husband will stop loving me as I get older.' - 'Mine would never do that with me. You know why, don't you. He's an antique dealer.'

100% Bombast-Filled Parka

'What do you mean 'when push came to shove, I patted'?'

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

'I envy your metabolism.'

'You know, it's not good for kids' self-esteem to keep harping on about this 'naughty or nice' stuff.'