Self-care Expert Gifts

"You choose now to suddenly become romantic?"

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Self help acupuncture

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

The adoration of the gels.

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

Work/Life Balance

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

Spa

Take the time to do something nice for yourself. Your kids will thank you. That is, if you ever decide to have them.

Bad fake tan day.

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Bad hair day!

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Surfing the daily stress

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

"Try thinking about something else."

"Instead of years of therapy, I decided to go for chocolate."

Leave your troubles in the bubbles

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"You work too hard. You have stress balls!"

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

Pampered and poodled.