Self-care Aficionado T-Shirts

Electrolysis Center

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"Which one of these things is the soap?" (Colour)

"My hair is taking too long to grow so let's shorten my face."

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

Bikini Wax and cellulite

"Sometimes I worry about not knowing what I'm worrying about."

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

Man burnt by hot water

Fake tan and no knickers.

'Karla worries about being asked to take her shoes off at the airport.'

Sorry, the beard is at an awkward stage

Josh suspected that Trevor loved his hair more than him.

'It's Mrs Palmer. She's set solid.'

Hair Salon.

'Alice, the blonde, speaking.'

"There's the bell for respite. . . I mean, recess."

Beauty Salon - Beast Salon

'And with this model we'll throw in free a self-basting attachment!'

'That bust cream has worked a treat.'

"Either she's had a lot of Botox, or her face is buffering."

"She'll try a bit of everything please."

Rubber Duck Has Made A Nest

Beauty regime

"I think I'll pass - I'm having a really bad-nose day."

The Bisque Narcissus.

A man with pink fluff exploding from his hands

"Yes, I think I'll have the vag/boob make-over combo plate."

Narcissus' cousin who's really self-conscious about his pores comes to visit.

Self help acupuncture

A woman with a green face mask sits next to an alien

'It says I'm the fairest one of all, and that you need a beard trim.'

The virtual vanity mirror.

New Twenty Blades

Dating is so expensive...