Self-acceptance Guru T-Shirts

'Hey, I'm no longer an ugly duckling! Now I'm an ugly duck!'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

"Always remember...it takes teamwork to get me that promotion!"

"The goal is to hate yourself."

"You left your demons here last week."

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

Man in Therapist office sees a sign: Therapy Is Expensive Bubble Wrap Is Cheap You Decide

Let go of the restrictions in your own head.

Thanks to therapy, Bob no longer felt like a nobody. He felt like an anybody.

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

Warning. Objects in mirror my bear no relation to reality.

Library: Self-Help Books and Blame a 'Rigged' Political System.

'This exotic dessert I make is guilt-free. I already burned all the calories running around finding the ingredients!'

'I'm not complaining or anything, but these are going to be really hard on our self-esteem!'

Congratulations!

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

"There's a wonderful book on memory tricks here, but I can't remember what I did with it!"

Broccoli: Just Full of Surprises!

DIY information - 'Here you are - look it up yourself.'

"It says here we should get a lodger."

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

"I knew you'd understand."

'I guess it was a mistake to make them self-starting.'

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

Declutter Your Life

'More isn't doing the trick lately. What comes AFTER more?'

"That was classic me."

'If you want them balanced, it'll be an extra 250 dollars.'

'I think they're still just sizing each other up.'

'When did you first notice the bald spot?'

Planned service changes