Seers Pillows

"I'll have to cance your appointment for next Friday. I'm going to be sick in bed with the flu."

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

Psychic Car Mechanics.

"I see you attending a family reunion, where things get quite heated."

"Regarding your letter of next Monday ... "

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

"Just what we've been looking for...a happy medium."

Big Medium

'Bring back my crystal ball!'

'I may charge a lot but you get much more through me. I'm a psychic large.'

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."

"I'll be right back."

A self-filling prophecy.

Mystic Writes 2014 Diary

"You will dance on your enemy's grave."

'Well, I'll be darned! It looks like just a lot of the same old stuff from here on out for you.'

"Who's there?"

COMPAGNIE D'ASSURANCE DE PARIS, 'I can't believe you sold an insurance policy to NOSTRADAMUS!'

"The future's looking bleak! Is that it?"

'Nostradamus enjoyed singing in the tub'

'I see a VERY important note from your doctor. Unfortunately, I can't read her handwriting.'

"I'd like to be tried by a Jury of my Seers."

'The mist is clearing.'

"You'll meet a handsome young man who will marry your best friend."

Fortune teller has a diary for 2017

Two psychics have shops next to each other; one advertises "Second Opinions".

'Are you going to bowl or are you going to peek into the future?'