Security And Surveillance Pillows

The Anti-Agent

UK border controls relaxed.

High security Santa's grotto

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"He's a guard dog."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

"I need to know who started it."

'Now that everyone's street is online, we're mapping interiors.'

"I see you've security marked your property."

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

Moulin Rouge Security

Scarecrows guarding a field

"Beware of Don"

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."