Secure Surfers Pillows

"Look, he's got his blanket. He's doing a secure search."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

TV-Man

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

'Ever since I started reading the newswpaper online, he's been bringing my computer to me.'

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

How I met your mother

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

'Welcome to digital - you now have more of what you didn't want than you ever thought possible!'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"There's no such thing as free wi-fi."

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

"Could you pass me up? I'm in row one."

Remote control wars.

"I never saw 'Cheers,' so I won't miss 'Cheers.'"

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

Digital TV presents "It's true there really is a channel for everyone"

'500 channels...surely there must be something worth watching.'

Fan-Centric Stadium

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

"We interrupt C.B.S.'s evening news with a special bulletin from N.B.C.!"

Mind control

Transformation of Man into Monster.

'It creeps me out when he watches the History Channel and takes notes!'

"How many new sitcoms will it make before they find a decent one?" "About twenty something"