Secretive Activities Gifts

'Remember, what happens in the basement stays in the basement!'

Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.

Caught in the Music

Was the Illuminati - now the Illuminasty

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

"Here's a buck, kid... Don't tell your mom I snuck out of my retirement home!"

'I knew I needed help when I started going to fast food places only at night so I wouldn't have to share with sea gulls.'

'I see you worked in government research - what kind?'

'In our thirty years of marriage she's squirreled away loads of money, but she can't remember where.'

Lady to lady about disguised lady: 'She's new to our Secret Sister program.'

"That? - oh my husband - a closet bricklayer."

"As you can see this is pretty embarrassing so I'd appreciate keeping it between you, me and this fence post."

'Every friend is a potential security breach.'

'This where the meeting for the order of the salmon bowl is?

'Is that some kind of ceremonial mask?'

Government "Information" Agency.

"That's right, Mr. Jenkins, we rejected your membership application because you wrote your name on it..."

'That's just the start. Today, keeper of the list. Tomorrow, who knows?'

The Ekert Saga: '...The Ekert Presahvation league has guarded this secret fah ovah a thousand years, so you can't tell anyone!'

'I can't figure out why Codex told me the keeper of the bowl died...'

Naughty Food

My Life as a Troll

Welcome to the Conspiracy Files...

Flower jumps back into its pot when a lady walks into the room.

This is Mort Park with breaking news. According to this reporter's secret source … Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell … secretly … watches Dr. Pimple Popper. Scandal!

GOD BLESS OUR UNDISCLOSED LOCATION.

C.V.-Mind your own business, "Welcome to the CIA."

"This is my husband, John. He works for the CIA."

DIMINATI

"Gosh, guys, I'm excited. This is my first cabal."

The Masons.

'Hello, is that Ace Stockbrokers?'

After discovering how much he enjoyed redactiing, Roger gets a little carried away.

"You are now fully initiated into the super secret savers club - you will receive twenty percent back on all in-store purchases."