Secret Spy Gifts

He kept pretending he was going to work when he was just running errands.

The Anti-Agent

"Bond James, Bond."

James Bond in a Snow Globe

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

Barks in code.

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

$1: Family Secrets

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

"Either we spend millions on new technology to erase each agent's memory following a sensitive assignment, or we just start hiring people over fifty."

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

"I spy with my little eye…"

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"I started my career as an industrial spy-here."

"Ok, I found a secure line."

Pile of top secret files on a train. Man saying 'Is that seat free'

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

Licensed to grill.

JAMES BONDING

'I'm counter - intelligence'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."

'Vital mission - movie parody'

Milkin' Impossible

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

"I've dabbled in espionage, but my main area of expertise is self-sabotage."

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'