Secret Spiller Gifts

'All I want for Christmas is a nice big roll of tape to wrap around my mouth.'

'I can't keep a secret, either!'

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

$1: Family Secrets

'I bet you think I'm drinking tea...'

He kept pretending he was going to work when he was just running errands.

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

The not so secret life of Walter Mitty

'Washington has wooden teeth? -- how did you find that out?', 'It came out in conversation.'

"Whoa, I guess dad and mom didn’t send Scraps off to live on a farm after all."

Parson wishing to seem as though he is not drinking

"Psst. Pass it on. Tonight's the break!..."

As you like it - 'Is my wife at home?' ' Yes sir, and also your cousin'

'Curiosity'

Billy strip: bed pan.

Galoots in cahoots

Rudolph Gets Even - "Reindeer Games - Their seedy underground activities finally revealed."

"It's the kids! Quick! Stash the cigs!"

A Vegetable Plot...

'So! THis is what you do all day.'

Convent's laundry.

"I bought this one behind my art consultant's back."

"Of course I could tell you more about the job...but then I would have to kill you!"

'I am the 'fly on the wall' you speak of. What would you like to know?'

"No, there's nothing I can add to it. It's a tell-all book."

Detective questions woman with body in hat.

Wiki Leaks

'It's my husband. . . quick, under the bed..'

'He tells his missus he only pops in here for a little piece and quiet!'

Dug regretted getting a job at the kebab factory.